WIX Archives

Are turbines ruining aviation?

Posted by Tony on Thu Oct 17, 2002 09:06:53 PM

Original poster

I.M Esperto on the PPrune Board, and an ex-intrepid Naval aviator....
(and a bloody good bloke)

Are Turbines Ruining Aviation?

We gotta get rid of turbines, they are ruining aviation.

We need to go back to big round engines.

Anybody can start a turbine, you just need to move a switch from "OFF"
to "START," and then remember to move it back to "ON" after a while. My
PC is harder to start.

Cranking a round engine requires skill, finesse and style. On some
planes, the pilots are not even allowed to do it.

Turbines start by whining for a while, then give a small lady-like poot
and start whining louder.

Round engines give a satisfying rattle-rattle, click-click BANG, more
rattles, another BANG, a big macho fart or two, more clicks, a lot of
smoke and finally a serious low pitched roar.

We like that. It's a guy thing.

When you start a round engine, your mind is engaged and you can
concentrate on the flight ahead. Starting a turbine is like flicking on
a ceiling fan: Useful, but hardly exciting.

Turbines don't break often enough, leading to aircrew boredom,
complacency and inattention. A round engine at speed looks and sounds
like it's going to blow at any minute.

This helps concentrate the mind.

Turbines don't have enough control levers to keep a pilot's attention.

There's nothing to fiddle with during the flight.

Turbines smell like a Boy Scout camp full of Coleman lanterns. Round
engines smell like God intended flying machines to smell.

I think I hear the nurse coming down the hall. I gotta go.

Ex-round engine driver.

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